I wore a sweater that blended into the couch today
its relatable because it portrays how well i've blended into the nothingness lately
I feel like a crazy person but she tells me i'm not (shes nice to say that even tho i know its wrong)
I feel like that curbside stuff (wont explain cause i know what this means myself)
i love nights on my porch, in my amish rockers
with Leonard singing to me cause he soothes me more than anyone else can
that and The Nationals "About Today" are my most relatable pits
(if you needed to know)
Am i losing my steadies? I hate that.
literally it kicks me in the gut
thats never an option I choose, but are they choosing that?
I wish the airplanes above me would take me away
From this and these pits and guts
man, and then that track comes on & I remember
the time I think i did love you but i tried my damndest to deny it
but that was years ago now
now its just a memory that plays with the song
you just walked away
and now so are they
what could i say
how close am I to losing you? tonight
my babies have seen my tears fall a lot lately
but they don't recognize what it means or why
how can i ask you about today?
not sure you're ready if you can bail so easily
but Gods peace be with u my lil bastard boi
(I say this seriously & sincerely with all my heart)
i miss how much you understood
with all of me i do, and i loved that of you
its why it breaks and hurts so much
but i wish you understood enough & more
oh my dear that you were
te tengo que dejar
tengo que dejarte ir
i know your stories and you know mine
but its not enough
what a slap in the face its been and is
that this is even an option to let be
to let go
lose the ones you're close to
but thats life?
thats a freakin life
Asà es
Y lo odio con todo mi ser
thats rotten (Leonard decided in his song what was rotten, what was fresh)
It will put a person in the pits (me)
you guys. its real crummy and sometimes u are too
thats no way to say goodbye
My feelings want to say piss on the beards of all of you
But my heart knows it's just aching for you all to be more real and true
(i know. what a ridiculous sappy baby I sound like)
But like the meditation goes:
Everything and everyone you love and worry about
..it's all vapor.
So I grow up and maybe I grew into a broken heart
several things in life have broke me
and who am i kidding. you're one of the things that broke again
if you scatter my ashes after i go
you wont have all the pieces of me i left with everyone else
i leave here broken hearted
but in heaven i'll be fine
